Post Ramadan Reflections: Christianity Saved Me and Islam Guided Me Aright
Islam was the connection of the dots. The Bible says, “in all thy getting, get an understanding,” and although I had taken that bit of wisdom to heart, I got lost upon the way. There are so many winding paths of knowledge, many of them interconnecting with one another but others not so much, and the gray areas can become deceptive mounds of quicksand, sucking you underground and suffocating you. And then there were the conflicting messages that I came across when reading the Bible. The Old Testament is very clear about the Oneness and Sovereignty of God, but the New Testament becomes cloudy as the role of Jesus, may Allah be pleased with him, and the Kingdom of God is discussed. Being given the gift of a Quran was like being given a bright lamp and I was able to see more clearly – to understand the scriptures that I was reading.
Reading the English translation of the Quran was a my first true introduction to Islam (I’d read the autobiography of Malcolm X in high school but the essence of the religion hadn’t clicked for me at that time) and although I’ve said and written this before: reading the translation of the Quran was like drinking from a well of fresh, pure water and it quenched me in a way that nothing else has since. My first reading, however, was just that – my first step towards Islam – and although I took shahadah soon after and began to hijab, there was still much that I needed to learn.
The wealth of information is vast and I stumbled along the way, practicing the deen sometimes to the best of my ability and sometimes without much conviction or faith. I was diagnosed with stage four cancer during this period and subhanaa’Allah, I survived the physical cancer, but once the chemotherapy was over, I was faced with the illness contained within my soul – the diseases contained within my heart.
I fortunately had the blessings of grace from Allah (SWT), a loving husband, and the prayerful, uplifting support of family and others which helped me to climb out from under the mire of the confusion and misguidance that threatened to consume me . . .